Goodbye Summer Fun.
I am usually as happy as the next parent to see September arrive and see the school year begin. This year is very different though. We had so much fun this summer. We took a week long vacation, just the three of us for a full week. This is the first time they have been old enough for me to feel comfortable doing this and it was so worth it. We went to the Upper Penninsula of Michigan and enjoyed the beautiful scenery and ice cold waters. We also enjoyed the very relaxed schedule summer offers. We stayed out late, we slept late and we just thoroughly enjoyed the fact that we weren’t trying to beat a bell everyday.
I feel like these past few months I was truly able to “enjoy” and even “relish” in being a mommy and this is the first time in a long, long time I have been able to say that. Red is 10 now and Hively will be 8 in a couple weeks. I am really enjoying these ages. They are independent enough to be helpful and reliable but not old enough yet to be smart mouthed, rebelious teens. Don’t get me wrong, Red has started some pre-teen behavior, but for the most part, this time with them has been the best so far.
Other reasons, I hate the school year…homework. I am hoing we get blessed with helpful, communicative teachers this year. I am more than willing to do homework with my kids but not hours a night during these elementary years. Also, I am willing to assist as long as detailed instructions are sent home because there is nothing worse than having a child cry that they don’t know how to do an assignment that you have no clue how to do either.
Then the end of summer, signifies the closely approching winter months. Y’all know how hard winter was for me during the 2007 Snowfest we were given here in Michigan. I am so scared by this fact, and what I had to live through, that I am sadder than ever to say goodbye to summer.
So say a prayer for this single mama that the 2008-2009 school year will be kind to us. And in return, I will absolutely do the same for you and your children.
Burnt.
So you can be burnt in many ways (as a human, as toast there is only one way heehee). I have probably been through them all and survived no worse for the wear. Burnt by another person as in when your unfaithful spouse abandons you with 2 babies to raise on your own. Burnt by the sun because you are too damn fair to be out watching boats or tennis without freshening up your sunscreen. Burnt by an employer who works you to death with little to no rewards or happens to issue you a dismissal right before they take credit for your work. Or there are those times when all or some version of these things descends upon you and you are basically “BURNT OUT.”
This is where I find myself currently. I am exhausted with kids fighting, kids homework, teacher notes, parent input, illness, work stress, laundry pile up, exhaustion from lack of sleep, money woes, pushy people who can’t comprehend single parenting and many other issues that seem to have closed in on me lately.
Let’s look specifically at the topic regarding school issues. From the informants I have in education, I have been told I should expect 10 minutes of homework per night, times the grade level. So, my first grade son Hively, should have an average of 10 minutes of homework per evening and my fourth grade daughter Red, should have 40 minutes. Let me put this mildly as to avoid blowing your minds…they have WAY MORE than these minimal standards. It is not that their teachers are so focused on education that they feel this will enhance their learning and help them love school. It is that the time in school hours is being used on art, music, spanish, chinese, and gym. In addition to lunch hour, recess and any rare assembly time. I do support art and music, I support foreign language also, I just don’t think there is enough time in their 7 hour school day for so much special interest. I just don’t feel there is enough focus on the basics and by basics I am referring to reading, writing, math and science. So the result is mountains of work, unfinished in the classroom sent home for me to help with for hours a night (in reference to the work sent for Red; usually it arrives without instruction and I myself am unable to comprehend what the teacher is looking for).
Today there was a straw, a mere minor straw that broke this big ole camels back!!!!! Hively came home with a note that said he is having issues in reading and it is an issue in the “phonics” department, it went on to say that “we” as in ME need to be working on this with him in addition to all the other work. Just a side bar for the record, I do this already! I READ TO MY CHILDREN AND WITH MY CHILDREN. I HAVE DONE THIS DAILY SINCE THEY WERE IN MY WOMB!!!!!!!!!!!
(Sorry but that someone insinuates otherwise is offensive to me.)
This child is at the higher end of intelligence. He does get this from his father actually. No, I am not an ignorant person, I just do not retain information like he and his father do. He can retain information like facts, dates, and numbers that astound me. However since the beginning of 2008 we have been having issues with him not wanting to write during independent writing times and not reading up to his ability. I have tried to communicate with the teacher that I would like the missed writing assignments to be completed at school and not sent home. I have suggested that though there is a punishment at home for not cooperating in class, maybe a more immediate consequence would be more effective. My suggestions are along the lines of: missing recess or a special class like gym that he truly enjoys. I have requested that he be made to sit in the principals office and complete the assignments and maybe this would have a stronger impact. I have also inquired if she feels this may be an attention issue with him, as these instances happen during independent time when he is expected to focus and self motivate himself to work. There is no behavioral issue here; this is merely a work ethic issue. He has been in this exact school for almost 3 full years now. If this “phonic” reading issue is in fact the problem, I hold that school responsible. This is the first I have heard of him having a phonics issue and up until the beginning of this year; we have done sight work flashcards nightly along with OUR NIGHTLY READING! So why is this a new issue? Is he not getting the attention he needs in class? Is there not a “reading support” teacher who can work with him? WHY?????????? Is this the first I am hearing of this “phonic” issue now at the end of first grade. I personally think the school…this particular school…is failing him! My first plan of action is to contact the principle in the morning and request a meeting with him and the teacher because if this is an issue, his school and his staff have let my child fall behind and I expect it to be repaired before his second grade year begins. Yes, I am willing to support them and do my part but it seems to me the issue is that they need to support me and do their part.
Why this straw, you are asking? Well, because this comes on the heels of all of us being struck with the stomach flu for about 10 day, Red turning 10 which was hard for me, her first slumber party with 12 friends included, the announcement that this is puberty week and she will be seeing the sex ed/puberty video on Friday and I had to have The Talk with her (because I wanted the info to come from me initially, and this is a whole post in itself), a school vocal concert and then this.
This camel is off to bed now and when I return if there is any teacher and/or parents who can give me advice on this Hively issue, please do comment because I need some input here. And if there are people who simply take pity on me for all this b.s. I am buried in; please just say a prayer for my sanity because I honestly feel it slip sliding away.
