He Thought He Was Being Funny!

Have y’all seen me?  I am not a very vain person. Carly Simon was definitely NOT talking about me.  That is for damn sure.Sure, I feel I am fairly attractive, I try to put in an effort (see here) to be presentable but as far as holding myself to the typical standard of beauty, I don’t do it.  I may be overweight but as I said, I still feel I am attractive enough regardless of this one minor issue.  I am one of those analytical types who believe our society puts too much emphasis on “typical” beauty when the true beauty of a person is so much more than what you see when you look at them.  As you know Red is coming up on 10 years old and this is a philosophy I have always tried to instill in her.  I am quite proud too, because in spite of her emersion in the Hannah Montana/HSM entertainment world, she actually seems to get this.  She is not vain either.  She looks nice and clean and presentable when she walks out of the house but she is also nice and kind hearted and has a vast repertoire of friends and tries to get along with everyone she is with.  Some girls in her grade have began being “catty” but she is not and this makes me proud.  Proud of whom she is and proud of the job I am doing with her.  But I digress, back to the topic.This week we (The Hub) got on this kick of checking our “Real Age” by taking this (http://www.oprah.com/health/lifestages/realage/health_real_main.jhtml) Dr. Oz test.  Yes, as I said, I am overweight, I don’t eat or exercise as I should, I don’t take vitamins or meditate daily and “hello” I am a single mother of 2 young children so we can safely say I do have a LARGE amount of stress in my life.  So I knew I just knew I was safe to assume I would rate a good 5+ years older in “Real Age” than my actual age is.  I was just about dead on.  I was 5.25 years older than 33 ½.  So, thanks for the advice Dr. Oz, the advice you give is truly helpful and I may try to find time in my life to implement some of the changes you advise.  However; if I do this, it will be for purely health related reason, it has nothing to do with appearance and how I feel when I look in the mirror.  It is all about how I feel, period.  When I look in the mirror, I do not see a 38 year old woman.  I see me.  Actually, I am very young at heart and I see a younger person than even 33 ½.  One of the things about the demise of my marriage that always left me saddened was the fact that I would not be growing old with someone who would look at me and see the 18 year old I had been when we met.  Not because I am vain…but because sometimes on a bad day when you are feeling, fat or old or ugly it is nice to look into the one you loves eyes and know they see the person you used to be.  No matter how old you grow with a mate, I think in their eyes you remain the person they saw you as when they fell in love with you.  And this is a nice thing on some days.Okay, so as I said I took this little quizzes results in stride because I expected the result I got.  Then I took Red and her friend to see High School Musical – On Ice and as we exited the arena and past the wall covered in famous musical icons, I proceeded to impress the girls with my knowledge of each of their names.  As we got to the end of this hall and came to the desk where a security guard stood, he looked at the two 9 year olds and said, “If you were 40 you’d know all of them too.”As he said this I was right beside him and without even thinking, I smacked him on the arm and said, “I AM NOT 40!”  I think he may have been shocked by my hitting him and he said, “Oh, sorry, 30….20.”  I said, “I’ll take 20 THANKS!”I felt like crap!  Do I really look 40?  I don’t see 40 in my mirror every morning but maybe I am wrong.  I see that he was trying to be funny.  I kinda felt bad for my reaction at first but the more I think about it, the more I think I hope he got a bruise from that smack.  He wasn’t funny at all and I actually hate him a little now!  He made me question myself and who I am and for that, he deserved the hit.